Ocean City Today

Berlin steps up to help art

By Stewart Dobson | Jun 29, 2017



printed 06/30/2017


I got a call from Berlin yesterday saying it plans to acquire Ocean City’s Art’s Alive! show as a Rule 5 draft pick for next season.

As baseball fans know, the Rule 5 draft is when one team snatches from another team a player who’s being held back in the minors because of a sunflower seed shortage in the big league dugout. Or something like that. It’s a big rulebook full of mystifying stuff (see Rule 705 — no catching the ball with your hat) so it’s possible.

“Originally, we had hoped to work a trade,” the Berlin caller said. “Our stormwater problems for Art’s Alive!, since we’re both having trouble finding a place for these things to go.

“Ocean City has great storm drains, while our calendar needs just one more thing on it for Berlin to win the title of “Most Neat-O Events Per Capita in the World.

“We thought we could squeeze it in between ‘Beer Is Really Good Day’ and the annual Lawn Maintenance Celebration. But, the resort shot it down, saying stormwater already floods portions of downtown, which has added to the complaints from uptown that downtown gets everything.”

The Rule 5 draft, by the way, has turned some players into stars, while others not so much (see Orioles and Luke Haggerty, late of the also now defunct Schaumburg Stars).

On the other hand, there’s the Orioles’ Darren O’Day, who came up as a Rule 5 pick of the New York Mets. And look where he is today — pulling down close to $8 million a year.

“We figure — and not counting beer sales — that if we can pull in $8 million with 100 vendors, that’s 80 grand apiece,” the caller said. “That’ll keep them in paint brushes for a year or more.”

When advised that such a number might be on the optimistic side, the caller said, “No worries. We’re also going to apply to the county for an ‘Arts Differential,’ you know, to be compensated for taking Art’s Alive! off Ocean City’s hands.

“So, yeah, I think this is going to work out just fine and … whoops, gotta run. It’s Disney World calling for advice.”


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